What A Slut: She's The Maid!
by Strawberry Flames
Summary: ONESHOT. Murdoc sees a girl looking for a job, misunderstands the offer, and...gets horny! Rated for mature themes and...Murdoc Murdoc, you horndog!


_**WHAT A SLUT: She's The MAID!**_

Strawberry: Two words: Murdoc is stupid.

Murdoc: That's three words, you dolt.

Strawberry: Oh…

Murdoc: Ya don't look it, but you are a true blond… And you're calling me dumb.

Strawberry: Well, can you blame me? In this story…oops! Don't wanna give it away!

Murdoc: You wrote the script…

Strawberry: O.O W-whatever! Just R&R peeps!

* * *

Luna stood at the end of Main Street in a pair of ripped jeans and a stained blue t-shirt. She held a sign that read, "Looking 4 Work". It was terribly hot outside today. There wasn't a cloud in the sky. Luna worried that with her pale complexion she'd get sunburned. But, after being evicted from her house, she needed to start getting serious about money and she'd do just that, even if it meant showing up for work as a fried potato.

A cluster of people came crashing down the sidewalk. Luna gritted her teeth and stepped back out of the way. But she recognized the two at the front. Stuart Tusspot and Murdoc Niccals of the Gorillaz. 2D and Mudds. Right in front of her. …Being attacked by fans that she wished she could join.

"Where's Ichigo when you need her?" said Luna, upset that her best friend wasn't here to see this. Ichigo probably wouldn't believe her. (Ichigo: Nice assumption, dub-dullard! Luna: -.-) "And why does my landlord have to kick me out _now_? Then I _could _be one of those rabid fangirls instead of a poor hobo looking for a job!" Luna sighed as they passed her. "At least I'm skilled in an area that people will have a need to pay for…"

No one answered Luna's desperate call for work. Pretty soon it was almost evening. She stood there impatiently, wishing someone would come up to her and throw money at her. The only time she came close to that happening was when Murdoc approached her. Inside her head, Luna screamed. Why couldn't he have been 2D? Ichigo would've died if she were in Luna's situation…

"I couldn't help but notice you're lookin' for a job, love," said Murdoc slyly. He leaned against the wall next to Luna. "And I'm here to answer your call."

"You'll hire me?" Luna exclaimed excitedly. Yes! Working for a famous dude ensured her LOADS of cash.

"'Course I will," said Murdoc, reaching in his pocket for his wallet.

"Well, I work as a—" Luna began.

"I know very well what ya work as," Murdoc interrupted. He waved some money in the air. "How much for the night?"

"Just the night?" said Luna, scratching her head. "I usually do more long-term jobs." Murdoc's eyes widened.

"How long?" he asked.

"Oh, well, typically a series of weeks," Luna replied. She could see Murdoc's tongue move around in his mouth. "I just work as long as you want me to."

"So ya want a pay-by-the-day kinda thing," said Murdoc. Luna shook her head.

"By the hour."

"_Hour_?"

"Yes, _hour_."

"All right, then, how _much _by the hour?"

"Five dollars." Murdoc put his money away.

"Whatever ya say, love," he said. "'Least ya work cheap. I hope the job measures up to the low pay ya get…" Luna smiled.

"I always give it my all!" she said, saluting him. "It's something I love doing!" Murdoc sighed and patted the side of her head.

"You'll make many men happy," he said. Luna cringed. She knew that a lot of men were messy, and she hoped he wasn't going to be. She loved what she did, and had no problem doing it all day, but it was always nice to know that the job wasn't crazy-hard.

Luna followed Murdoc to his Winnebago that night at ten. Looking at the outside told her she had her work cut out for her. Murdoc slammed open the door and threw out his arms. "Welcome to my love shack…" he hissed, closing the door behind Luna when she'd walked in. She looked around and cringed. It was terribly disgusting, as she'd feared. She walked through towards his room, which was no better as much as she'd hoped it would be. He stood in front of his bed enthusiastically and then pulled off his shirt. "Well, start," he said, beginning to unzip his pants.

For a minute, Luna stood in shock. "Omigod, no!" she screeched. Murdoc froze.

"Wot's ya problem?" he said. "I told you I'd pay you!"

Luna wanted to throw up. Instead, she slapped Murdoc ferociously across the face. "Do you have any idea how old I am?" she yelled. "_Too _young for you, you pervert!" Murdoc stood there, running his hand up and down his face.

"Are you the same person I talked to today?" he asked, clearly lost. "You _agreed _to do this." Luna shook her head, quivering.

"I agreed to be your _maid_!" she said. "But seeing as your mind lives in the gutter, you were thinking something else! I'm outta here!" Luna flipped him off disgusted and started backing away.

"Oh," said Murdoc stupidly. "Well…how was I supposed to know! Get out!" Luna obeyed and went crashing out of the Winnebago. "Now I've got nothin' to do!" he yelled after her.


End file.
